Sometimes a girl just wants to wait quietly for the bus, not hear some stranger’s tale of woe. On the other hand, I feel honored to be a confidant, to hear people’s stories and to be able to provide some insight for people I love or admire.
For whatever reason--- call it intuition or divine guidance or dumb luck--- I seem to know what to say, when to say it, or when to say nothing at all and just listen.
But sometimes...ah sometimes, it is difficult to discern when people are seeking honesty and when they are merely seeking confirmation of their own opinions.
Lately, the seemingly innocent question "What do you think?" is anything but. I’m finding that, more often than not these days, it is a loaded question. What a person is really asking is "I’m right...right?"
I’m sympathetic, but I don’t coddle people when they come to me for perspective. In the past, I believed that was the reason why people came to me.
When asked my opinion, my opinion is what I give, otherwise I try to be a mirror and help guide people to what they already intuitively know they must do in a given situation, without judgment.
Several of the most important people in my life recently asked for my opinions of, or help with, their current situations. None were satisfied with my answers, and somehow I ended up looking like the asshole for speaking my mind.
So I’m closing up shop.
The crisis center is CLOSED...
Don’t ask me if you should break up with the girl you’re cheating on, don’t ask me if I think you’re really turning into an alcoholic, don’t ask me if I think he’ll change...don’t ask me unless you’re prepared to hear what I really think---and then don’t hold it against me.
I haven’t the energy for it these days.